Today I have been given my life back!

So here I am facing the consultant who gave me the cancer diagnosis and stamped a ‘best before’ date on me nearly a year ago.  The same room, the same place.  My Mum, Dad, brother and Jenny holding hands and breath.

And the news is I am in remission!  But my goodness didn’t he make me work for it!

“Hello, how are you feeling?”

“Great… I hope, just need to hear the results please”

“Oh, you had a CT Scan did you? When was that?  How odd, my secretary didn’t warn me…”.

Lots of rustling around on the desk and frantic logging in on the computer. “Let me get the scan results up now”. 

Oh dear no, surely not.  Where are the hidden cameras? We are going to have to do this live, anxiously watching every twitch on my consultant’s face as he reads the scan results out aloud for the first time in front of us. 

After what seemed like an eternity discussing my bowel and liver surgeries and the fact that I had (unbeknown to me) another 1cm cyst on my liver which he ‘presumes’ my liver surgeon knew about and was therefore not cancer….he said “Yes this looks fine, you are NED (no evidence of disease) or NSR (no sign of recurrence)!” And for extra emphasis “considering where we were a year ago and how aggressive it was, it’s amazing we have got rid of it”.

I could kiss him.  He was grinning and said I looked really healthy. And believe me this is a very good sign from Mr H who doesn’t give good news lightly.

Joseph said this day was the best of his life and he hasn’t stopped hugging me.  Lois has been very thoughtful and reflective and admitted to crying on the school bus today with nerves.  I doubt I will ever know how deep this last year has affected them.

Today I have my life given back to me and I am deeply happy and thankful. 

Thankful to my 2 consultants and oncologist and the docs and nurses who have nursed me back to health.  Thankful to my Mum and Dad and brother who have loved me back to life.  And thankful to my dearest friends and close family who never gave up hope and have been by my side every day.  Especially Jenny who has been one in a million throughout these last 10 months and kept me sane with nonsense all day. And thankful to God for answering my prayers.

Now all I need to do is get this chemo out my system and start to feel normal again.  Mr H said to expect this to take about 2 months.  Last chemo tablets taken tonight and the rest of the bag of tablets chucked in the bin, replaced by a diet of Champagne! At least for this week. x

16 thoughts on “Today I have been given my life back!

  1. Rachel – unbelievably great news!! Well done. Well done. Well done. You did it. The last time we met up, was on the 10th August. In the West End, and had a very pleasant few glasses of wine joking about how brave we were risking the rioting which was just settling down at the time. A week later I was in the West Country on holiday with family and received your upsetting text. Same time, same place?!!! Cheers!! Grant

  2. Of course! Let’s do it! I am so happy I just wish everyone who has cancer could experience this news. My thoughts are with those who are not so lucky and still fighting. Cruel, random disease. Which makes it even more important to live whilst we can eh. I am truly lucky and blessed and a little tipsy!

  3. Our deep gratitude too, for the love and encouragement we have received from family and friends, (one with almost daily phone calls) which, with our faith in God, has sustained us over the past year. And of course, Rachel’s cheerful and uncomplaining acceptance of her situation has been inspirational. Mum and Dad

  4. Ditto. I can’t imagine what it would be like to watch your child struggle with cancer and pray I never have to. But you have both set the platinum standard and the toll on you both must be massive. So this is your time too to relax and breath and spoil yourselves. You couldn’t possibly have done anymore, I am overwhelmed with love and thanks. X

  5. Good grief! Aren’t Doctors just the best. I remember ours telling us that Ma was a gonner and then a week later she woke up. My father aged ten years during that week. She;s fine of course. So whats next? When will you be running around?

  6. Fantastic news, Rachel! Can’t wait to see you back at work – you’ve really got no excuses now! – just give us a few days to get the Lay-Z-Boy recliner installed in your office. Oh, and your own mini bar of champagne.

  7. brilliant fantabulous news!! wahoo!! We will be sure to drink some champagne to celebrate too! hopefully we can celebrate together soon! xxxxxxxxxxx

  8. I am overwhelmed. I keep spot bursting into tears. It is the bestist news ever in the whole wide world. WHAT A WOMAN Rachel is. And what a family she has. I was blessed to be there yesterday with them, and blessed to share all the tears and giggles and hugs and huge outpouring of love, and shock, and dancing and more hugging and constant beep beeps of all our mobile phones. It felt like a million people were calling in with love and congratulations and happiness. A hugely special family, with one amazing lady at the centre of it. Well done darling Rachel, well done for all of your strength and purpose and getting through it. And thank you to everyone, all of you, anyone who has touched her life over this journey. You are all amazing, really truly amazing. THANK YOU. In my case from the bottom of my heart. In Rachel’s case from the heart of her bottom! Jen x

  9. From CCH….

    Rachel Bown we are as happy as can be
    To hear that you have fought the big ‘C’
    For 10 months you have been an inspiration
    With grit, strength and determination
    Fighting every step thrown at you each day
    With piano playing and radio chats along the way
    Your blog kept you going with your bananagiraffes
    Providing tears and stories with plenty of laughs
    Your family and friends have been your rock
    And now it’s time to recover and take stock
    So crack open the bubbly and raise your glass
    To Rachel, who definitely kicked its arse!


  10. hmmmmm……thought your mum and dad looked as though they were floating on air when they passed the shop, WELL DONE lovely family you are all amazing and deserve an applause, bravo bravo, but no encore please xxx

  11. Dear Rachel

    Thank you very much for contacting me earlier in the week and apologies for the delay in getting back to you, I have been working away for the last few days on a prostate cancer project and only returned last night.

    Congratulations on your great news, I am very happy for you.

    Would it be convenient for me to call you later today? If so, what time would be best?

    With thanks and best wishes,

    Sam Watts

    The Cancer Survivorship Programme

  12. Hello Rachel
    I have only just found this site but have been thinking about you ever since I heard the news and you disappeared from the office a year or so ago. Congratulations on the remission, I can’t imagine what you have been through. Wonderful news and look forward to seeing you back soon – you have been missed!
    Melissa x

  13. Massive congrats Rachel. It’s always heartening to hear of someone a few steps ahead getting the all clear. Will keep with my positive thoughts and look forward to sharing similar news with you in six months time!! Charley xx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s