I have to confess I may have overdone things..

I have taken to this positive mind/body thing so enthusiastically that I have literally convinced myself in the last few days that I am as fit and well as the next man (unless of course the next man is Jack Lemmon in the Odd Couple).  My memory has also colluded in this farce and downplayed any knowledge of past surgeries or chemo drips.  In fact my old surgery sites (bowel and liver) have taken on the air of elder statesmen who scoff at the little chemo upstart and tell him in their day they practically let the surgeon rip me open whilst on nothing more than paracetamol.

This is obviously how the human brain is wired to cope. Just ask any women who has given birth more than once.  But this lack of memory and denial from my brain doesn’t help my poor physical body who has just about had enough of this and is staging flash daytime sleep attacks.  In fact I am periously close to becoming narcoleptic.

And if that isn’t enough you can add schizophrenic to the list.  There is the sensible me which went through the surgery and the bad days of chemo and takes care of all the pain stuff.  And there is the silly me which does the challenges and writing.  The problem is the silly me doesn’t know when to stop and the sensible me has to tell it off frequently.

Goodnight. x

3 thoughts on “I have to confess I may have overdone things..

  1. Rachel, I have no advice for you my lovely. But I’m having a Baileys which is pretty good. I’d also prescribe the Audrey Hepburn box set. Makes you feel busy whilst sat down, xxx

  2. Madam, you are reminding me of the ad for the new Cadbury’s fingers – the Dallas one where the blonde crazy finger reveals she has white chocolate inside as well as milk chocolate, and biscuit. I think that finger is a Rachel finger.

  3. BUT if you didn’t have the silly you (not so much silly as frighteningly enthusiastic) then you know life would be boring eh?. I have just been talked into going to Japan to climb a mountain , and I agreed (cries), no where near what you are going through BUT that is my silly side. On the topic of silly sides I went to see Maddie, Jules and Amelie (you can directly blame my sister for all three of them) and we spontaneously went into songs of ‘he jumped from forty thousand feet ..and he aint going to jump no more’ (logical I would say, there is no more jumping there!) , and …’im a bow legged chicken im a knock kneed hen, never been so happy since I don’t know when, I walk with a giggle and a squiggle and a sqwark doing the Tennessee wig walk’ .. this song sang full pelt is accompanied by chicken type movements around the living room. At which point my other half put his head in his hands and went ‘oh my life there are more of you than just you’. A curse we all live with indeed. SO chin up , and embrace your silliness, sometimes it is the one thing that keeps you going you know. Always laugh, never cry 🙂 much love x

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